He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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