no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
