Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I think my fart just growled at me.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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