big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.