Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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