going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
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