It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
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