So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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