Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
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