I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
Randomize
