gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
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