You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Randomize