We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Randomize
