i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
