how hairy? two words: wookie tits
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Randomize
