do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
Randomize
