ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize