I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
Boobs are out for the taking
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
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