question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Randomize