Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
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