Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
