do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
