I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
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