The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
kristin has been a bad kristin
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
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