Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
Randomize
