no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize