Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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