remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
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