your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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