You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Randomize
