Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
