You smell like a Billy Joel song
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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