ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
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