so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
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