Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
