dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
My mom is lecturing me about 'invaluable housekeeping skills' while I google 'cocktails involving gin' on my phone. I can feel the generational gap looming in her silent judgment of my choices.
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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