Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
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