I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
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