i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
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