new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
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