Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
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He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
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