Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
