you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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