talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize
