Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
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