I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
just tell him i said nine months
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.