Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
Walk of Shame today included voting.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
Randomize
