Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Based on my calculations, I should be blackout by approximately 11:14pm and that's when I need you to take my phone away from me. Mkay?
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
Randomize
