I wish I only lived at night.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
Randomize
