Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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