Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
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