considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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