After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Randomize
