are you so shy because you have an std?
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
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